Soul food

RDP: Sunday – Feed

Unfortunately, during the pandemic, with many hours at home and good access to the internet, I became an online buyer of many things I don’t really need. It was boredom, and being self-employed, I did experience a degree of anxiety about the future, when my outreach work was impacted. Pressing a button to buy something gave me a nice little buzz that became a habit every day. Being busy and travelling as much as I did before the pandemic and after, I often paid people to do tasks, as it saved time. I didn’t realise it, but I was moving dangerously into learned helplessness and a struggling bank balance.

Although I have retained some of my earlier contracts, my new contract books me solid for a week or two and then I spend three weeks at home. The shift has been interesting. It has given me space to reboot my lifestyle. So I’m starting today by joining the ‘No Buy July’ challenge (except for absolute essentials like batteries, petrol and groceries). With screwdriver in hand, I’m even going to attempt doing things for myself. I’m taking charge again.

Change is always difficult to adapt to for most people. But essential. My physical health deteriorated over a couple of years to the point I was exhausted from pain and reduced mobility. I reasoned with myself, if the slide was downwards, I needed to find a path back to health. That momentum was found in the first step from the car, to the forest. That movement, that change, was essential to my overall well being and it helped me get back on track.

As mentioned in a previous post, not being in peak health some time ago I headed to the deep forests of the south west.

The forest sounds were soothing and I emerged two to three times a day from the healing of ‘forest bathing’.

Among the tall timber, I found myself, again.

And I found mind and body more integrated when I saw the tiny red winged splendid fairy wren foraging, for the first time. This one is a female.

Plain and simple and almost invisible among the debris, she is well sought by the male. How awesome is that!

The male is a sight to behold! Brilliant in colour, and poised, this tiny creature has a presence among tall timber. I can still remember the visceral response to seeing this tiny creature in all its glory.

These wrens, some people believe, have a spiritual symbolism. They represent change and moving on from something that no longer feeds your soul, is “positive disloyalty” (wildspeak.com).

People, sometimes, stay in toxic situations longer than they need to. I believe, fear, is a powerful anchor that keeps them from walking. For others, fear of the unknown. Little did I know at that time, there was a major career change ahead of me.

Although I will miss the outback, the soul food offered in the South West in my corner of the world, is an unexpected gift. So, I accept with gratitude.

May you find trust in the Universe to provide you with all that you need.

Until next time

As always

a dawn bird