RDP – Page 3 – A Shared Space

Look into my eyes …

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Green ant, East Kimberley region, Western Australia

It was early morning in the warm and humid Kimberley region, far north of the State, between Kununurra and Wyndham, when I woke in tree tops, to a wonderland. There was a Pretty Face wallaby below at the billabong and I watched anxiously, hoping the resident saltwater crocodile was not around. The birds were waking and the air filled with birdsong. They were all species new to me, some tiny finches and other large water birds, up in the trees. I didn’t know where to point my camera. I didn’t want to miss a moment of the experience. But, nothing could have prepared me for the next few minutes.

The Kimberley region is stunning country. The landscapes are expansive and humbling. The coast, rugged and just gorgeous. The weather can be harsh. Extreme heat and tropical storms. Accessibility to some places can be restricted at certain times of the year as there are some unsealed roads to usual tourist spots. It is country that demands respect for all that nature delivers. This is also snake, spider and crocodile country, so I’m instinctively cautious when I travel in this region. Spiders don’t scare me, but we do have some in Australia that are best left alone. A quick check around one’s environment, is good practice. As I stood above the billabong in the shade of the tree canopy, and went to lean on the metal railing, they caught my eye. A steady stream of ants. Jewel like, they their bodies glistened like emeralds. I had never seen green ants before. I was fascinated.

Have you ever looked into the eyes of an ant? I was mesmerised. The intelligence, the awareness of my presence, the guard, all in one tiny creature. In that moment of connection, I was tiny, and the ant, a giant presence. An unforgettable moment, a moment larger than life!

May you seek and experience those moments, too.

As always

Until next time

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Friday – Macro

Lost in reverie …

The morning was warm,
the breeze soft
Beyond the back door, the garden
where I walked happily
when I caught a glimpse of him
in reverie …

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Karijini National Park, Pilbara region, Western Australia

He was tall as a tree
and just as strong
with roots that ran deep,
underground
under my fingertips
his skin ridged and rough
entwined, his hands gnarled,
unlike mine
above ground
his eyes crinkled in sun, in smile
his veins blue, his blood earthy red
amid the midnight rustle,
the softest whisper, come closer
so on the bough I laid my head

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Thursday – Backdoor

My bags are packed …

Yes, my bags are packed. I take my first flight for 2020 today. I’ve been home since just before Christmas except for driving a quick few days in the South West for work.

It’s been an expensive hiatus getting major home maintenance underway while doing minimal paid work. I had planned on a few days holiday, doing nothing but writing and photography, but being a fierce fire season, I thought best not to as I had planned on visiting tall timber country. I’ve rescheduled that for winter now.

Being home has paid off in other ways. Stationary, I’ve caught up on other jobs. The one-off maintenance tasks will be completed by the end of the month. I’ve got a new handyman who I can work with and that’s a huge relief.

This morning I walked around the back garden. I’ve heard the sprinklers working in the last week and was curious to see how plants are doing. There’s a sense of relief that the garden will heal from the negligence of my previous gardener. I plan to keep a closer eye on things from now on.Like hope, the pink crepe myrtle is bursting with blooms and buds. Previously, the flowers appeared mostly in cooler weather when it rained. While photographing it, I inhaled deeply with delight.
I inhaled the unmistakable perfume of jasmine! Adjacent to the crepe myrtle, my jasmine ‘tree’ has a few flowers nestled deep in green, yes, green, foliage! The water is getting through to them! If you’ve ever nuzzled your face into your baby’s neck and inhaled the sweetness of being, you’ll know what I mean when I say I did the same. I can’t wipe the smile off my face. Such simple pleasures to start my day!

I’m off today, flying north, for more complicated experiences!

Until next time

As always

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Tuesday – Stationary

When Dawn breaks …

This year
your forever birthday is remembered again
So this morning I woke treading memories
Of where I’ve been
It’s been years
Yet sometimes it feels
I’ve moved on, a day

I wake most mornings alone
While others come and go
Where you once had been
Their warmth is now comforting,
It shouldn’t be, but it is
I’m learning to live guilt free

I recall wrestling with demons was exhausting
they came dressed in well meaning words from friends
in this journey,
life goes on, they said

I’ve found life is not a journey
just as well,
it would had ended long before now
but it didn’t,
somewhere my footsteps faltered
I’m glad they did

I found my home, a new home
to house my body and soul
It has no doors, no gates or windows
The breeze flows
I shut nothing out, nothing in
That’s where, each day, I begin

I reframed the journey,
that common metaphor, into a mirror
it had to be done for me to stand still, and face face
I seek joy in each day
Sometimes in moments like this
finding I now sit comfortably,
in that precarious place
side by side, with pain

And in that moment,
reality takes hold, with each passing day
Grief does not crush
to self, I am true
I am healed, open again
to be loved and to love deeply

Could I have been this brave
Had I not lost you?

a dawn bird

In response RDP – Monday – Daylight

“Ancora Imparo”, Michelangelo

At 87 years of age, Michelangelo said, “Ancora Imparo” (still I am learning). It is a quote I love. It guided me throughout my university years and beyond. As a research student the excitement was not finding the answers, but finding more questions that took me down new paths. That excitement stays with me in this blogging world when I come across phrases and words that are unfamiliar. Then there are those that are familiar but have other meanings, new to me.

The word gregarious is not new to me. It is not a word anyone who knows me would use to describe me. As luck would have it, I come from a large, loving, accomplished and gregarious family but I never found my place under their sun. Perhaps that’s why I am quiet, observant, reserved. I learnt from a very young age, the need for solitude was critical to develop into the person I’m happy to be.

Perhaps from the loss of the family I once knew, oddly enough despite having a reserved nature, I’m drawn to gregarious people, especially men. I’m attracted to men who laugh heartily, who can tell a joke and hold people captive when they speak, who can say in a booming voice, “how are ya!” and mean it. Yes, they make me smile long after I’ve met them.
Son’s wedding, Perth Zoo, Western Australia
So the word gregarious is one I associate with the most is, parties and people.
I would use the word gregarious to describe this friendly Splendid Fairy Wren, as well. One that is used to being around people like this one at The Berry Farm, in the Margaret River region. The little cafe is set in a beautiful small garden where wrens, silvereye, honeyeaters and thornbills are constantly looking for crumbs. Elsewhere in the scrub, the fairy wren is a shy, timid creature that disappears quicker than I can blink and a source of great disappointment when I cannot get the picture I want.
My backyard is definitely party time every dusk when the rainbow lorikeets visit.
They love the mulberry tree where fruit is plentiful when in season.
Grass Trees, Wanagarren Reserve, near Lancelin, Western Australia

Like I said at the beginning, the word gregarious is one I know well and associate with people and birds. But I didn’t know until today, it can also be used to describe trees!

I tend to give a wide berth to those who know it all. To me, that is a sure sign of someone with a closed mind and where learning is stagnant.

So may the new year bring lots of moments of “Oh! I didn’t know that!”. There’s a sense of excitement in that phrase that I crave. May you do too.

Until next time

As always

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Thursday – Gregarious

As the fires burn, breathe easy …

Carlton Ridge, Kununurra, Western Australia (aka The Sleeping Buddha or Elephant Rock, depending on the vantage).

Breathe easy
the industry pundits were right all along
the economy is booming
there’s more where this came from
the scientists got it wrong
after all, nature is forgiving. Nature heals itself.

Breathe easy
This is a natural cycle
The destruction, the change
It’s happened before
And will happen again

You see, we are The Believers
this is our God given right
we are The Chosen Ones
Breathe easy
we can do whatever we like

The forests are on fire!
Scorched earth all around!
You say, it’s click bait
your entitled tongue speaks Aussie vernacular
Yeah nah, breathe easy
She’ll be right, mate.

Breathe easy
you were in my thoughts and prayers
while I was away, the country burned
I returned eventually to shake your hand
it was the least I did for you

The truth is obvious
there is no elephant in the room
in a democracy, where every vote counts
at the ballot box we will breathe easy
as we end the lunacy of false prosperity.

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Friday – Breathe

Eyes like stars …

This has been one of the happiest decades of my life so why write about the year, when there is more to celebrate!

My work is a labour of love. No ifs and buts about it. It feels I have emerged from automatic mode. A huge gamble to give up tenured government work for the unknown of working for self has paid off dividends in the most unexpected ways.

I travel extensively, never tiring, always anticipating, never knowing what the day will bring me professionally. I love the excitement of this. I do know what it brings me spiritually consistently and that’s what I’d like to share with you.
Cable Beach, Broome, Western Australia
I discovered, depending where you stand, sand can glitter like gold. thumb_IMG_0515_1024
And gold can be beige like sand.

Cable Beach, Broome, Western Australia
I accepted sometimes in the most beautiful place, people can walk into the picture for a moment and when they leave, it is still the most beautiful place.

Featherflower (verticordia grandis), Lesueur National Park, Jurien Bay, Western Australia
I found Nature is filled with fountains of vivid colour.
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No more in muted clothing, I wear colours to remind me what keeps me alive inside.
Cable Beach, Broome, Western Australia
A sunset is not the end of the day, it is a sunrise elsewhere.
Benedictine Monastery, New Norcia, Western Australia
No longer captive, I look through windows because I am captivated.
Oyster Harbour, King George Sound, Albany, Western Australia
I discovered sometimes the light shines brightest on what is not there, to illuminate this truth.
HMAS Sydney II Memorial, Geraldton, Western Australia
That when we pause to remember, family, friend or stranger, we may be left behind but we are never alone. There is companionship in memories.

Wedge-tailed eagle, Midwest outback, Western Australia
Although mesmerised, to be wary of the magnificence of a predator.

Splendid Fairywren, Bunbury, Western Australia
Blue is the colour of sheer joy, not a state of being.
Boab Tree family, Eastern Kimberley region, Western Australia
I found my ‘voice’ this decade, at the foot of the Mother Boab tree where the ancient wisdom of trees healed my grief.
Karijini National Park, Pilbara, Western Australia
In the harshest country, I accepted the gift of peace.
On the way to Diggers’ Rest, East Kimberley region, Western Australia
In the company of strangers, I found family.
Twilight Beach, Esperance, Western Australia
In a moment of silence I found clouds are there to balance a perfect picture.
Frangipani, Karratha, Western Australia
Once an impossible dream, I now awaken to the scent of frangipani, symbol of love and devotion, and also the symbol of new life and renewal. Oh! the irony to find this in mining country!

Thank you for your presence in my life. May the next year and next decade fill you with hope for a better world. Look closer, not in the distance or in someone else, and you’ll find it, like I did.

Happy New Year!

As always

a dawn bird

In response to Word of the Day Challenge – Labor

In response to RDP – Tuesday – Stellar

This evanescent life …

“Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.” Mother Theresa

I love this quote. Time is never fleeting, never wasted if we have the courage to begin, to explore, to re-calibrate from where we are.

This year I spent more time in the Midwest outback than I have in any other year and hopefully this will continue.
I’ve worked along the coast from north to the south and enjoyed the intense company of seagulls.
In the Wheatbelt town of Merredin I found a silent space within me while listening to the raucous squawking of red tail black cockatoos, high in the gum trees.
In the Midwest outback town of Mt Magnet I found these beautiful succulent flowers. The ant and granite sand gives some perspective how tiny these flowers are.
I loved this deserted Masonic Lodge (circa 1899) in the outback town of Cue.
The pink flower carpet that surrounded the ghost town of Big Bell, just outside Cue, was stunning.
We enjoyed dinner here in an outback pub where dusty cowboys propped up the bar.
And even in the outback one could not get away from American politics! This was Herbert Hoover’s bedroom when he worked as a mining engineer in Western Australia in the late 1800s. This is now a lounge room at the motel where we stayed.
There were long drives on lonely highways in the company of road trains.
And waking to outback sunrises.
This was a big wall of tattoo photographs at the Billabong Roadhouse, in the Midwest outback. I thought it was pretty cool!
I spent a lot of time at airports with miners and where I met Muse.
I found I’m patient when faced with barriers. This forced me to drive between 5-10 kms an hour (speed limit was 110km/hour) for over 40 kms in the eastern Wheatbelt.
I visited The Leaning Tree, Greenough, outside Geraldton. Just because I love it so.

“I am Wirnda Ngadara
The leaning tree
I have grown this way
from too much breeze
My twisted trunk
bowed down to search
and pay respect
to Mother Earth
Stand here awhile
and look at me
I am Wirnda Ngadara
The leaning tree.
Nola Gregory, 2014

I have been brave and adventurous this year. The next year brings with it promise of new experiences with old loves. thumb_IMG_0696_1024
To embrace the new year I found my mantra on the Iron Balls gin bottle.

“You always have options, if you have balls”.

And, that my friends, I do!

May time stand still for you, for just a moment, so you can re-calibrate your compass for the new year and find the direction you seek.

Until next time

As always

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Sunday – Fugacious

On an otherwise beige day …

Like many people Christmas time can also be a time of sadness and I try hard not to dwell on what brings pain. But it is days like today that I have to actively try not to feel overwhelmed because there are decisions I have to make on my own.

Being mostly home for the next few weeks I am working through a schedule of house maintenance that needs my urgent attention. Today was the day I phoned around for quotes to fix the reticulation system as my gardener does not know how to navigate the technical side of it. I was already up by 4:30 am and working through reports. The morning was beautiful and cool, the waterbirds were loud as they headed to the lake. The first man came over at 6 am. He would have experienced my pocket of the world at its best. He fussed around and gave me a quote to fix two solenoid valves ($3.5K). Yes, three and a half thousand dollars! (It is possible he charged for the view). He then tells me if I paid cash, he would charge me a grand less. I’m someone who is fastidious about my taxes. To be complicit in someone else’s scam to dodge tax was a red flag. I thanked him and found someone who just happens to live around the corner from me. He dropped by on the way home. He spent around three hours in the garden. He could not access one of the valves that is buried under the hedge. I suggested I would get the gardener to remove part of the hedge (after all it will grow back once it gets water) and he could come back next week. We came to an agreement with that plan. As he was leaving I came out with my credit card. He flatly refused to charge me for his time ($70 call out fee plus hourly rate) because he could not access the valve. I nearly cried! I insisted he give me a bill after all he worked for hours in heat and digging is strenuous work. He then agreed to include the hours in his invoice once he returned to finish the job on condition I accept he would not charge me an additional call out fee. Such kindness!

It is my firm belief we get to experience the good and the bad in people. We don’t need to search for these experiences, they present themselves. We just have to be open to them. I could be upset with the man who gave me an inflated quote. But why bother? It is his loss he missed out on a job. Being upset would be my loss of peace of mind.

It has taken me years to process a simple fact. It is not the event but how we live through the aftermath that determines how it impacts us. That’s the space, the toehold, where life is either lived as intended, or not. I’m not quite there yet, but I intend to live mine, with intent.

Until next time

As always

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Friday – Aftermath

The tradition of Christmas …

Christmas will be different in my home this year. My son and his wife, the newlyweds from earlier this year, are hosting the family Christmas meal. It is strangely quiet in my home. Usually I’m in the throes of a three day cooking fest but not this year. We will have a family meal at my place in the first week of 2020 when my daughter’s partner is home from his FIFO (fly in fly out) offshore work.

Christmas in my home is all about family, about laughter, food and being together. I usually give one of the young adults a joke or riddle book or a board game and against the background of loud laughter, I put the finishing touches to the meal. This year I’m relaxing and will be relaxing at the couple’s home tomorrow. I’m slowly giving up the reins for the young adults to carry on tradition. There is a special joy in this transition as they emerge and become who they are meant to be.

After all the decades of living in a country where Christmas is celebrated in summer, I still yearn for a cold Christmas. It is a fond memory from childhood in India. We would each hold a candle skirted in cardboard paper, while attending Midnight Mass outdoors under freezing clear night skies. The emphasis on gifts was minimal. But, there was a huge focus on visiting family and friends between Christmas Eve and the Feast of Epiphany in January and that tradition continues to date in my life here in Australia.

This year the gift giving in my home is remarkable for reasons I’ll share with you. I hate shopping centres. The crowds, the parking woes, the queues. The trolleys filled with useless gifts generates a sense of despair in me. I hate it all. So from a very young age I would encourage my children to give me a list of what they wanted and I would choose something from it. I would avoid browsing and I liked that. As they grew older, their taste in gifts changed as one would expect and I had to accommodate their preferences.

My beautiful daughter, who embraces life with unfettered enthusiasm, has always asked for two tickets to the music festival which takes place in January. This has been the only gift she has requested for about ten years now. As much as I disliked her attending the festival where recreational drugs are rife, she would assure me she would be there for the music alone. (Yes, I know!) I would give in, stay awake until she would text me she was home again. Sigh! This year she requested pots and pans. Pots and pans! She and her partner moved into their own home earlier this year and nesting, it would seem. He would love a voucher for the local hardware shop so he can get on to landscaping the backyard, she tells me. I’m still reeling from the shock!

My son on the other hand loves video games and I dislike buying those too. There’s so much more to do in life than a controller in hand, I say to him. But it is part of their social life where a game night means visiting each other, ordering food in and playing games. This year he and his wife wanted a dinner set. He told me they have an assortment of plates and cups. “We would love a dinner set where everything matches, mum!” This heartfelt request from a gamer!

So I’ve returned from a day’s shopping with pots and pans and a dinner set and a voucher for Bunnings. It would seem that the young adults have become adults while I was sleeping.

This year has been different on many levels. I can feel my world changing. At times listing, at times balanced, at times blurry, but there’s an air of celebration in my world. An undeniable feeling of anticipation and hope that the birth of the Christ Child symbolizes.

Whatever your belief or faith, may you experience celebration in your world, too. May your heart and home be filled with the love and laughter of family and friends. This is my wish for you.

Merry Christmas and peace!

As always

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Tuesday – Candle

“We cannot cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy” – Joseph Campbell

I returned home today from the last trip of the year. Flying over Perth I felt an affection for the city I call home. I was home. The thought resonated deeply.

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Like the humble dragonfly I have flown many miles this year. Alighting gently, hovering and taking off again dozens of times. I should be tired. Oddly enough, I’m not. There’s still light in my eyes and within as I look forward to the new year.

As darkness falls, my neighbourhood is alive with lights, music, and laughter of children water bombing into swimming pools. I can feel Christmas in the air. It’s time to stop and take a deep breath and relax with a glass of chilled liquid sparkle.

Until next time

As always

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Friday – Sparkle

In Wheatbelt country …

Courtesy ABC News (Australia)

On my way to Moora I drove through this region a day before the fire. The landscape was beige and beautiful. I turned the music off and smiled to myself for most of the trip. I felt like I was driving through live art, the softest water colours of Hans Heysen, one of my favourite Australian artists, depicted in land and trees. When there is a breeze among gum trees, if you close your eyes and listen, you hear the ocean. But during this trip, the gum trees were still. I knew they were silent, too. It was the calm before the storm. I didn’t know this at the time.

This fire is further away from home. There is a bigger one closer north to my place that has been raging for days which seems to flare up intermittently and causing concern.

The city skies were sepia on Sunday as I drove out to Narrogin, south east of home. Once out of the city, it is a heavily wooded drive for most of the journey. In the distance I could see a blanket of smoke from yet another big fire from the tall timber country of Collie in the south west. I stopped roadside briefly to take a picture. It was silent and eerie in this vast landscape. During the night I woke several times to sirens and speeding vehicles, no doubt headed towards Collie. I decided to come home a day earlier as I didn’t risk getting caught in a long detour and miss the flight I’m taking today.

The lack of rain and extreme heat, a deadly mix, generates a tinderbox for sure. I cling to hope when the areas that are burnt to cinders will regenerate in spring as many Australian flora need extreme heat. It is harder for people to pick up the pieces though, when they lose livestock and homes. And, I cannot bear to think of all those animals caught up in this!

I drove through Foxes Lair soon after I arrived in Narrogin. It was dusk and not a creature stirred. It was the same in the morning when I usually hear the kookaburras and galahs creating a ruckus in the treetops. Coffee in hand, I looked outside my hotel door and saw just a slight quiver among flowers. It was all I needed to make me smile again,

New Holland Honeyeater among grevillea flowers, Narrogin, Western Australia

The other day I flew home from yet another trip. It was 40 degrees celsius on the day. The announcement of clear skies with strong winds and extreme heat made my heart sink. From experience, in that particular region, it can mean a rough flight. I fly dozens of times a year, but it was one of the worst flights I have ever experienced. The poor cabin crew got caught half way in the aisle when we hit turbulence. She crawled on hands and knees back to her seat. Each time I reached to steady myself by holding the seat in front of me, my hand flew so high off course, it touched the ceiling. For a nervous flyer, I’m learning, I am made of steel.

I’m off today for my last trip of the year. And, what a year it has been! A mix of joy and sadness. There will be time to write about this in the coming days when I’m home again for several days.

Until then

As always

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Monday – Mix

Today I cried …

West Beach, Esperance, Western Australia

I’m preparing for my penultimate trip before Christmas but felt the need to take a few minutes from work to write.

The last few months have been a constant source of concern as I read about the political events around the world. A mere mortal, caught up in a world that seems increasingly resistant to change for the better, leaves me with a feeling of hopelessness. Winning at any cost, seems the goal. How did prominent world leaders get here? They did not ‘ascend’ to the throne as do royalty. They were ‘elected’ by the people. That’s an unnerving scenario.

This morning I cried when I read the news headlines. Not because I read about those who have the honour and privilege to lead countries, fail at the first block of integrity, but because I believe and I know, there are good people in this world too.

The tragic disaster in New Zealand is case in point. The loss of life and injuries under awful circumstances made me subdued. To read of the specialist police recovery team that went out on a still active volcano, despite the inherent danger to them on that site, so they could return the bodies to waiting loved ones, made me cry. These are ordinary people, who do extraordinary things.

Anyone is capable of extraordinary things and as equally as anyone is capable of heinous acts. If we are not guided by that internal compass of integrated heart and mind, a compass that requires constant fine tuning by what think, see and do then, the day of reckoning, good or bad, may take time but is inevitable.

May you find time to ‘fine tune’ today. Your thoughts, words and acts matter.

Until next time

As always

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Friday – Reckoning

You don’t need arms to hug

thumb_IMG_1256_1024 You don’t need arms to hug
sometimes, words will do
a look, too, can be sufficient
or a touch, or text that says,
I’m here for you
A thoughtful gesture
is much like a hug
ordering my second coffee, for instance
without me asking you to
switching sides without complaining, when we sleep
you know I like facing the door
It’s just one of my quirks, we laugh
I’m always thankful, you’ve never asked me to explain more
How about the ordinary?
like a walk along the shore,
or explaining to me patiently, yet again,
the intricacies of that damned alternator, that cost a fortune to fix
Yes, I tell him
we don’t need arms to hug
sometimes words and gestures will do
because together or apart
We means, a me and a you.

a dawn bird

In response to RDP – Saturday – Hugs

Shaken, not stirred

DSCN9984 2.JPG
There was a time
when they read each other like a book
turned the page each day
to a new line
as the years rolled into one
the book frayed
the pages became fragile, with weight
and no discernible lines
as they smiled through the cracked veneer
of once hallowed ground
no one the wiser
except his heart that yearned
yearned for what once was
and now knows, can never be
the fairytale, he hoped it could have been
because he couldn’t leave.

a dawn bird

In response to RPD – Monday – Stir

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